• 7 a.m. — Woke up refreshed. Practiced Yoga, then went for a brisk morning jog.
• 8 a.m. — Came up with all of the Challenges for the next two episodes of Fetch. Hurray!
• 9 a.m. — Woke up and realized that waking up at 7 a.m. was just a dream. Drat.
• 10 a.m. — Made some freshly-squeezed orange and herring juice. Feeling rejuvenated, I cleaned the house top-to-bottom, nimbly avoiding stepping in Blossom's litter box. Then I got to work on those Challenges.
• 11 a.m. — Woke up and realized waking up at 9 a.m. was also a dream. Drat and double drat. That orange and herring juice should have tipped me off. Yecch.
• 1 p.m. — Stepped in Blossom's litter box for the third time today. Yup, I'm definitely awake this time.
• 2 p.m. — I found a pink ribbon outside. I deduce that the pink ribbon belongs to Charlene. Charlene is the poodle who lives next door to me. The poodle who has stolen my heart but lately has acted a little "cold" to me. And by "lately," I mean "ever-since-I-first-met-her." I quickly come up with a plan–write the most beautiful love poem ever written, and return her ribbon to her, wrapped in the poem. Charlene, moved to tears, will ask if I want to grab a sandwich with her. I'll order something sophisticated. Something with goat cheese. She'll be impressed. She'll finally realize that she's living next door to the dog of her dreams. Brilliant Plan! Okay, now the poem. Let's see...what rhymes with "poodle"...
• 3 p.m. — No, really. What rhymes with "poodle"?!
• 5 p.m. — Ah hah! Strudel! Okay, now we're cookin'.
• 7 p.m. — Okay, let's see–So far in my poem, I've compared her to a strudel and a noodle. This poem isn't going very well.
• 9 p.m. — Time running out, I deliver poem and ribbon through the fence.
• 9:01 p.m. — Immediately regret it, and reach through fence to retrieve poem.
• 9:02 p.m. — Head gets stuck in fence.
• 10 p.m. — Head finally out of fence. Poem retrieved. Back home, I wonder if maybe I've been dreaming this whole time.
• 10:01 p.m. — I step in Blossom's litter box. Nope, I'm awake alright.

Always fascinating, always entertaining, always…